Thirty, flirty and thriving (apparently)

28 07 2006

Its my birthday today and I am actually pretty upbeat about turning 30 (having dreaded it all year!)…  I love this time of year because its also my brother’s birthday (yesterday) and my husband’s (tomorrow) so its just like Christmas only without the cold and mince pies.  Tonight we are off out to a party at a friend who also shares her birthday with us and then tomorrow there should be 19 for dinner (at a restaurant – I’m not stupid, people!!!). 

In other news, I got 70% for my third writing assignment which I am thrilled about (although it is ironic that I get the lowest mark in the one I worked longest on!).


Let’s get physical

26 07 2006

Last night I had my first sesh with Mr Motivator and ooh it was good. I am feeling v positive and into the whole fitness thing – if only I could drag my sorry ass out of bed half an hour early and I would be golden. There is pretty much ZERO chance of me doing any exercise now until Monday as its BIRTHDAY WEEKEND!!!!

Tomorrow I am at my bro’s for the night in Brighton (his bday is tom), then the next day is my 30th, then the Saturday is my hubbies bday so its all celebrations and alcohol and food and presents and general fun and laughter and NOT about walk/running for a mile. It feels like my birthday has already started as I was ‘encouraged’ to open presents from my in-laws tonight (lots of lovely things) and then Rich insisted I open the main pressie from him which was the most gorgeous ruby ring – I am still grinning like a goon about it – he has just fabulous taste!!!

Not a great start, admittedly.

19 07 2006

I just had my first ‘encouraging’ phone-call from Mr Motivator, my personal trainer.  I am ashamed to say that I told a fib.  I am meant to have gone for 2 of my 4 weekly 1-mile powerwalks (Monday and today) and I have done neither.  I told him that I had missed this morning but would do it tonight (which I do intend to do) but I failed to admit I also missed Monday’s.  I now have to make sure I catch up so that I can look him in the eye next Tuesday.  I am finding it so hard to get up just 30 minutes earlier… it doesn’t help that it’s so hot I am not sleeping very well (see more excuses – I am great at them!).

So anyway wish me luck for tonight!

Drop and gimme twenty…

18 07 2006

For my upcoming 30th birthday, my parents suggested they get a personal trainer for me.  At first, I was pretty hacked off – yeah ok I do *need* to lose weight and sure a personal trainer *would* be the best way to do it and yeah, I wouldn’t *necessarily* get off my arse and do anything about it otherwise (other than bitch and moan to my long suffering husband about it) – but did I really need to have this as my present for my birthday where I am already feeling sensitive about getting old???  So what, I am old and fat – is that what you are saying, Mum???

But I have now got over myself and realised this is a really excellent opportunity because I do feel pretty miserable about my size and doing the job/commute I do makes it far too easy to find an excuse not to exercise.  Little Miss Ungrateful has now left the building and since Saturday, I officially have my own personal trainer which is exciting, depressing and pretty cool all at the same time.

I was completely bricking it before he came – I had no clue what to expect. I was half-expecting Mr Motivator to be standing on my doorstep or worse, Sgt Major Dickwad who was going to break me if it’s the last thing he did… thankfully I was wrong. My Mr Motivator is actually a really normal (but very fit) 50 year old (which kind of puts me to shame but hey… ) who seems to have the right mix of positivity and reality that makes me think it might just work. Its cool to think that I might actually shed some of the extra layers that have been getting me down and get healthier and fitter in the meantime.

Now for what needs to be done: He set a pretty realistic eating target (have breakfast, eat more fruit, drink more water – not rocket science) and he also set the following exercise regime: Mon, Wed, Fri – 1 mile power walk before work (I have so far missed this yesterday and today so I must do it tonight!) 30 min walk every lunchtime Mon – Fri and Nightly exercises – done and done! He is back for his next session a week today … will keep you posted.

Utter relief

13 07 2006

I am so relieved to have finished this at last.  Writing poetry is NOT something that comes naturally to me and I am just so glad to have this one under my belt.  I am actually fairly pleased with the end result which probably means I will get a completely sucky mark (I never can judge this properly) but right now I am just pleased to have submitted it – and a day early too!!!

So here it is:

The Ruined House

A house’s glass eyes catch mine,
Drawing me from my sunny walk.
Almost hidden are walls of vine;
The broken stone held by reedy stalk.
I clamber across a nettle-filled ditch,
Over an old fence blackened by the wind.
The stings on my legs are starting to itch;
On the gate, an unreadable sign is pinned.

My curiosity silenced by mossy floor
Til I brush past bushes and disturb a flock.
A forgotten path leads to a splintered door,
A long-spun web protects the lock.
The once white paint is now dull grey,
A faded pediment adorned by a dove.
As I stoop to a statue moulded from clay,
I’m startled by a clamouring from up above.

A jet-black crow lands on the crumbling stack
And pecks at the remaining loose roof tiles.
Dust is sent flying in a cloud of black,
The caw of the crow the only sound for miles.
As I move towards the nearest front window
My skin is chilled by rising dread
For scraps of paper scrawled with a madman’s flow
Are pasted face-out proclaiming “She’s dead!”

I urgently scan across each jaundiced page
Some words collided, but some untangled
A story recorded of obsession and rage,
A husband’s confession, a wife’s body mangled.
Black clouds veil the darkening sky
No breeze to disturb the eerie still
Then from within the house – a piercing cry –
And a candlestick clatters from the windowsill.

Turning, fleeing, I run into a passer-by
“What’s wrong, young lady” his eyes full of sadness
I try to speak but my throat’s too dry.
“The house” I gasp, “those rants of madness”
His inky hand grabs my neck, my hair
His shrivelled face is drained of life
“You never should have trespassed there!
Now you’ve disturbed my demented dead wife!”


Mark: 70%

ETA: I am so psyched that I have finished this because I can now start writing here more often (I wouldn’t let myself post anything until I had finished that assignment). I have become a compulsive blog-reader and am enjoying the whole random ‘next blog’ button for finding the weird and the wonderful! The great thing is that the next part of my course is Life Writing so I can legitimately update my blog and read others as practice and research respectively!!!! As if I need more of an excuse!…

Contemplating my next writing assignment

6 07 2006

When I get home tonight I have to read 10 chapters of my coursebook as I am SOOOOO behind it’s not even funny. Then, I have to do my next assignment TMA03 and I am already half a week into a two week extension to the deadline.. so yeah, I better get writing. This is the first time I have written a poem for years and I have to admit I am pretty anxious about it. I have no issue with writing my commentary afterwards – that will be a piece of cake – but its just getting 40 lines down of something passable enough that a) I don’t embarrass myself and b) it is good enough to get me a Level 2 pass (which is what I am aiming for overall).

The ironic thing is I have really enjoyed both the Literature courses I have done so far towards my OU degree but finding the time and energy has been increasingly difficult. I am also thinking about what my third course will be so that I can get on to the October course.

ETA I have decided to post all my on OU assignments (TMAs) on here (have backdated the posts for TMA01 and TMA02 as at the date I picked up the marked papers). EEEK.

Finally I post another entry

6 07 2006

Having read the blog of TWoP’s Erin, I feel inspired to continue this blog and I will try to uncensor myself this time! I can’t write much now but I vow to get started on this in earnest.

Ciao for now.